“My skulls have bugs..” Excuse me? “My skulls… I pulled them out to take them to scouts tonight, and bugs got in them!”
At precisely 9:30 last night, my dear husband informs me that his precious animal skull collection has been invaded by some small, unseen creatures. As the wife of a Wildlife Biologist, you would think that I would be used to such things by now. Mostly I am. What I wasn’t prepared for was the sad, dejected look that came with the knowledge that his little friends had been victimized so thoughtlessly. I was tempted to sing “The Circle of Life” to him, but I thought better of it. Also, I’m somewhat distracted by the thought that I can’t remember if he’s been storing aforementioned skulls INSIDE the house (along with the offending bugs?), or outside in the garage where I could care less. As I try to cheer him up with the knowledge that “they probably didn’t feel a thing,” I’m told that the nasty blue towel they were so lovingly wrapped in is now lying smoldering on my laundry room floor. Lovely. (How does one wash a buggy towel? Borax? Clorox? Straight in the trash? Yep, that’s what I’m thinking.. the outside trash..)
I’m also bothered by the fact that if Daron were ever detained for questioning, the fact that we have a fully functioning skull collection at our house would implicate him in about 2700 unsolved crimes. I’ve seen enough NCIS to know that skull collections may not equal motive, but they’re not exactly evidence that will speak to your upstanding character either. Promise me that you will all be witnesses for the defense, should the time ever come…
At precisely 9:30 last night, my dear husband informs me that his precious animal skull collection has been invaded by some small, unseen creatures. As the wife of a Wildlife Biologist, you would think that I would be used to such things by now. Mostly I am. What I wasn’t prepared for was the sad, dejected look that came with the knowledge that his little friends had been victimized so thoughtlessly. I was tempted to sing “The Circle of Life” to him, but I thought better of it. Also, I’m somewhat distracted by the thought that I can’t remember if he’s been storing aforementioned skulls INSIDE the house (along with the offending bugs?), or outside in the garage where I could care less. As I try to cheer him up with the knowledge that “they probably didn’t feel a thing,” I’m told that the nasty blue towel they were so lovingly wrapped in is now lying smoldering on my laundry room floor. Lovely. (How does one wash a buggy towel? Borax? Clorox? Straight in the trash? Yep, that’s what I’m thinking.. the outside trash..)
I’m also bothered by the fact that if Daron were ever detained for questioning, the fact that we have a fully functioning skull collection at our house would implicate him in about 2700 unsolved crimes. I’ve seen enough NCIS to know that skull collections may not equal motive, but they’re not exactly evidence that will speak to your upstanding character either. Promise me that you will all be witnesses for the defense, should the time ever come…
3 comments:
It's such a surprise. Daron was always so nice and quiet. I had no idea...?
good thing the social worker didn't find those skulls during the homestudy.
It reminds me of a conversation I had once with Daron... 1994, I am coming out of Calculus to meet Daron for our trip home from school. As I came off the stair well, Daron says, "I could have just killed you. A dead bee with his stinger dipped in poison delivered like a blow dart. They could never trace it." Now is that the witness I'm supposed to bare or just that I never saw him obtain those skulls. -Jay
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