Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Third Trimester!

As of Sunday, Kelli is 27 weeks along and officially into her third trimester!! She's been feeling a bit better these days, although Jack is a little stinker and likes to play trampoline on her bladder, and sit on a particularly painful nerve. His favorite position is to lay sideways, punching his fists up underneath Kelli's ribs. He's a very active baby, and a hard kicker.

The top five questions many of you are asking these days:

1. Are you ready? -Yes and No. Yes, because this is something we've been wanting, planning, waiting, and pleading for since 2002. No, because it's way more fun to shop for blankets and paci's and bouncy seats than it is to paint the nursery. Actually, let's be really honest with ourselves- Why is the nursery not painted? Because it's still deer season, and in the contract I signed when we got married, I agreed to look the other way when my better half spends 1-2 days of each glorious fall week sitting in a deer stand. Anything having to do with paint will require paternal involvement.

2. Did you know Rush is coming? -Yes, yes, yes, yes, YES. I knowwww. I'm painfully aware that they are coming. On April Fools day too. Ha ha. Very funny. The irony isn't lost on me, people. Reality: with a 10 day old baby, and probably only being barely back in the state, a Rush concert in Greensboro probably isn't feasible. Ahhhhh, this must be what they mean when they talk about parental sacrifices. I sooooo get it now.

3. Middle name yet? -No. We have one in mind, but we're waiting for final approval from the name's rightful owner. Long story. We are open to suggestions, and in particular "O" names (except not really).. Daron thinks it would be hilarious for him to have J.O.B. as initials.... as in, "boy, stop asking me for money... you need to go getta JOB!.." ....Ahh, dad humor.

4. Are things still going well? -Absolutely. Kelli is a great girl, and we've become particularly close. Sometimes life offers you opportunities you didn't expect, and the potential of a lifelong relationship/friendship with Jack's birthmom is an unexpected bonus. And not to mention, wonderful for Jack. Attitudes towards adoption and "open" adoptions in particular are so much healthier than they used to be.

5. What about work? -The plan right now is to take Jack with me while he's small and sleeping a lot. I've got a great office environment, room for a crib, and the flexibility to come and go. As soon as it's not feasible to have a baby in the office, I'll gradually whittle down my hours, and transition out. I'm not going to lie, not working is going to be very weird. I've worked full time for the last 20 years, so doing anything different from that will take some adjustment. I'm one of those odd ducks that really loves working, and feeling productive and contributory. My mindset now is that motherhood will be mindblowingly awesome, and I'll never feel the need to look back.

As we get closer and closer, I find myself becoming more and more excited and nervous. Excited for all the pretty obvious reasons, but nervous because of the many unknowns. My Type-A, plan-for-all-outcomes nature has been tested over and over again in this experience. I'm really having to rely on faith, and the hope that everything will work out just as it should. Daron has been instrumental in keeping me focused on the big picture. Just so I'm clear, I'm not worried about anything falling through- I'm anxious and empathetic for Kelli, and Jack's whole biological family- for the trial this has been and will be for their family. I'm anxious about the birth, and the lawyers, and the 1000 little surprise details that must be attended to. It's naive of me to wish for everything to run smoothly, and I fear being inadequate or underprepared for anything that might pop up. I'm sure this is just preparation for parenthood, where 85% of the time you're inadequate or underprepared.

13 weeks to go!