Just a quick update. We really are doing fine. It's pretty much back to normal at our house, and although I still have the periodic twinge of sadness, they are getting fewer and farther between. It's helped just to stack everything back in the nursery and close the door. The task I work hardest at is banishing the thought of "what if it doesn't ever happen?" It's embarrassing to admit that I give in to despair sometimes, but I'm learning to squash those thoughts as they pop up. I keep telling myself that there has to be some sort of reason or plan in all this, and it's ok for me not to know it. I also have to make myself not over think things. Even if this never happens for us, we've got to be ok with that possibility too. It helps living with the eternal optimist. How did a cynic like me end up with Pollyanna? Not sure, but it's a good thing I did. He's taught me how to be grateful for what I DO have. To love each day for what it is, and the opportunities that surely lie ahead. That even with our trials, we still don't have much to complain about.
So many of you have sent meals, checked in, emailed, sent cards, sent flowers, and just generally showed us that you care. Also, a big thank you to my counselors and leaders that pretty much took over my calling for the last two weeks. That was a huge weight lifted. If there was one positive thing to come out of this, it was to learn just how loved we really are. You allowed us our space, but still made your loving presence known. Thank you for that!